Mother knows best
by Enchanter T.I.M
Summary: Leandra gets little love as it is, what with Malcolm gone in each version of her retold. But what if we were to see the things we don't normally see her do...in a whole new light? WARNING:NSFW
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:I have to warn this is NSFW since this is me basically filling in my own kinkmeme involving Leandra, being the hot MILF she is. This being a series of oneshots will have different settings with various Hawke's and ranging from short to long randomly. Granted I am saying this upfront these will not contain rape, non/con, scat...or incest. I have no clue why people request those and frankly if someone requests me that your getting a big middle finger from me. Not into it.  
Bioware owns what my pervy old man senses like to think up.**

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The Viscount's keep was busy as usual in the mornings with the city guard milling about, either on duty or off hours. Hired staff were cleaning up keeping things tidy or running errands to be transported to different offices. Then there was the long line of nobles, merchants, ne'er do wells all for their appointments to see Viscount Dumar. For Leandra, this seemed to be her entire lot for the day milling about in a line that barely moved an inch because some fop was arguing with Dumar over a 0.65% rise in their taxes for some azalea seeds.

Leandra couldn't help but wonder how she used to whine as they did in her youth over trivialities. Presently, she actually had important business She held in her hand, a painfully written, letter for obtaining the deed for the Amell estate. After finding out what become of her Ancestral home thanks to her darling son, she made it her life mission to stop grousing and try to ensure her children could have a proper legacy and the right influence to keep Bethany out of the Circle.

However, at this rate, she would be here a fortnight and the line would still not budge an inch; and her old peers would still be looking on at her like a country bumpkin.

"Well I am surprised to see you here Leandra," a familiar voice says next to her causing her start.

"Hello Senechal Bran. Forgive me if I seem less enthusiastic in greeting, but today seems to be a bit draining at the moment," She felt a simultaneous headache from lack of sleeping and skipping out on her breakfast.

"Ahh, I can tell since I am on a luncheon break. What brings you here for business if your son isn't here braying like a jackass to gain attention." Bran visibly bristled at the thought of Garret smiling smugly..

Leandra held in her tongue at the apt description of her son, but she didn't have to like it. "Oh just waiting like the others for a petition concerning family. Hopefully, I might be done with the ordeal before the next blight."

"Well I can say you would be right since this is considered a slow day in the office."

"Really now, Senechal B-" She stopped as Bran lifted up his hand.

"Please Madame, you may call me Bran." He smiled warmly forgetting he just called her son a jackass.

"Yes well Bran, if this is a slow day I hate to see what you considered a hectic day." Leandra wondered if it was ever like the troupers that traveled through Lothering. Without all the political back stabbing

"I assure you it probably wouldn't match whatever fun idea you have conjured in your mind. If so, I would wish it was more like it."

Leandra held in a polite laugh covering her mouth until Bran moved his hand, in polite gesture, onto Leandra's shoulders, edging her out of sight. "However since your son has done the Viscount a personal service, I would be delighted if you were to join me. My meals are always too big and I end up throwing it away. It would be a shame to let a mother go without."

"Why, thank you Bran. It would be nice to eat a meal made by someone else. Although, I am quite the cook so I might end up making it, anyway." Leandra chuckled as Bran led her to his office.

They spent a good portion chatting in his office going over the details of what happened in Kirkwall from her exodus to Bran's current career. Leandra knew it had been some years since she was in polite company, but she enjoyed herself thinking how easy it was to slip back into old manners. Napkins being used and folded neatly, having a posture straight and proud, offering polite giggles at mundane quips. It all returned quickly, indeed. As their meals were finished, Bran decided to take their conversation into a different direction by pouring her some wine.

"So tell me Leandra, do you think your petition will make it to the good grace of the viscount at this current rate, or are you holding out until your son's expedition will hopefully pull through?"

"By all means, I leave nothing to chance on something important as this. I intend to be prepared."

"You will be waiting a long time for those papers to see Viscount Dumar, even on a slow day, such as this. What with Duke Boluard's missing Laperdoodle, rooting out the Guards on Jeven's payroll and maker forbid the Qunari problem. Also, even if your son's expedition pulls through, who's to say he'll have the money to buy the lease." He held in a polite smile as he got out of his seat towards Leandra.

"My boy is a hard worker...and as much as I disapprove of his job, he has never failed our family."

Leandra became a little worried, sipping on her wine thinking on various outcomes concerning the estate. Bran noticed her dismay walking behind and placed his on her shoulders rubbing gently rather intimately.

"Forgive ma Madame for giving you unwanted stress, but it is my job as Senechal to go through the proper channels for everyone on matters like this. However..." A predatory smile slowly crept onto his lips.

Leandra turned around looking at Bran as if he had was going to her a devious secret to shortcut the system. "No, do tell! If its anything useful, I will do what is needed to help my family, to do anything less, I wouldn't be an Amell."

"Perhaps if you were willing to do a favor, of personal importance, might I add, then I could speed the loitering process. I can have your estate ready for your family once your 'esteemed' boy comes back from his trip," Hands moved slowly down to her collarbone and back to her neck.

It only takes Leandra a second to stand up with rage. "Senechal Bran! You are not going to ask what I am thinking you will."

"Perhaps I am, perhaps I am not. Either way all paperwork headed for Dumar goes through my meticulous hands before they are deemed worthy of his time. Surely you know how this game is played." He gazed upon Leandra's breasts with perverted glee.

Leandra knew what was asked and felt angry at how this man would treat her like such a slattern, yet she felt hot shame knowing this was the only way to help her children as she sat back down in the seat. Taking her silence as approval Bran placed his hands back onto her shoulders massaging them. Moving his hands southward, feeling her skin rise in goosebumps, Bran groped her breasts from the outside.

"I say, Leandra, for a woman of your age your breasts are clearly magnificent! One should expect that of nobility," He pinched her nipple roughly tugging it out as his other hand moved inside her shirt for a firm grope. "Even when they have fallen from grace."

"Please don't say such vulgar things; and stop pinching my breasts like some toy. I may be old but they are still sensitive." He stopped to feel hot liquid travel down his spine from her outburst.

Bran chuckled at her remark moving the other hand inside her shirt pulling both breasts free. Walking in front of Leandra for a better view, he knelt down, pinching the nipples gently before swirling them with his thumbs. He pushes them together watching taking in the sovereign coin sized areolas as his arousal hardened and grew.

"I dare say, for all the times I've seen your daughter present, with her bountiful size, you put hers to shame with these lovely visions." Bran sighed taking a nipple into his mouth.

Leandra said nothing in return looking down at Bran suckle her like a hungry babe. For a scene that used to make her feel happy, it was perverted by a man, who most likely had mother issues, just to ensure favors of the office. Even worse was the warm feeling she felt blossom inside her core from his tongue and lips lapping at each nipple. She held still as statue trying to reign inner growing arousal after going without for so long. It seemed her body loved the attention being lavished on her since Malcolm's passing.

Fighting back a shudder down her spine from the pull of Bran's lips, Leandra tried to ease the situation, imaging it was Malcolm doing such an intimate act on her. If she had to do this, she would enjoy it on her terms. Leandra envision Malcolm's hands , that were giant like the rest of him, caressing her nipples with their calloused finger pads. His was a really hairy man, so he was extra gentle with his stubble as he nuzzled suckling on her teat like a lamb. Malcolm was always her gentle giant.

Bran opened his mouth wider swallowing more of the left breast, taking in much possible, while he vigorously pinched the right nipple. He tweaked it and twirled it making Leandra whimper in small gasps. Hearing her hold back the pleasure from this made his erection ache harder for more. Looking over at his Dwarven water-clock told him differently, as he was already stretched for time. Letting go of the breast from his mouth with an audible pop, Bran watched them bounce. Licking his lips from how they magically defied gravity, Bran stood up for Leandra to gaze on his tented pants.

"It seems I have taken up a majority of my break. More than I had expected." He hastily undid his laces pulling out his twitching cock. "But it seems we should end this deal in a good way." He voiced hitched as he took himself in hand.

Leandra knew what was to come since she knowledgeable of the act she performed on Malcolm several times. Bran stood there wanking himself with one hand staring down at her with lust ridden eye. After a quick glance she stared at his eyes to maintain contact, as she refused to look at his eager prick.

No one could hold a candle to Malcolm's penis and Bran's...was somewhat tolerable. It' wasn't that Bran's couldn't satisfy a normal woman and be considered lacking. It was just his was on the narrow side and longer length. However Malcolm's was considered perfect to fit Leandra, although he was a tad shorter than Bran, but thankfully thicker in both girth and his tip made their lovemaking enjoyable for both parties.

Without taking cue she held up her breasts, playing with her nipples to keep stimulated, as Bran rubbed on some hand oil before slipped his eager prick into the valley. He bit his lips at how warm her breasts were squeezing his cock as he bucked forward.

Her breasts were warm encircling his penis with oil and sweat. Leandra sat still blocking out Bran's heavy breathing and fumbled curses at how tight she was. She felt a twinge of pain as Bran ignored her earlier warning by pinching her nipples back painfully. His humping became erratic as the hot sensation in his balls tripled from fucking a woman he secretly lusted for in his youth.

Feeling that the end was near and time moving against him, he grabbed a tit in each hand forcefully bucking like a wild animal.

Leandra suppressed a moan that came up, surprising her, from Bran's manhandling of her mammaries. She was thankful the ordeal was near it's conclusion. Without warning, Bran pinched her nose closed, making her panic to breathe out her open mouth. As soon as her lips parted Bran shoved his cock inside her mouth, deep throating her like a madman. Leandra thankfully didn't gag from the intrusion, but accidentally scrapped her teeth along the shaft. Bran, on the other hand, paid no mind, holding her head in place as he emptied himself in her mouth. Leandra almost felt her stomach lurch at the slimy semen coat her mouth, slithering down her throat. Bran refused to leave her mouth, steadily pumping out a few more squirts.

Finally sated from the ordeal, he leaned back on his desk, head bent back in ecstasy, and breathing heavily from the release. Grabbing the wine goblet next to him, he handed it to Leandra before righting himself back in his pants. She drained the glass quickly, much quicker than was proper, but was thankful to be washing the awful taste from her mouth.

"I will say you performed beyond my expectation, Lady Amell. I have to say your husband was a lucky man to have such a..." He leered at her breasts as she righted them back into her dress. "Bountiful woman all to himself."

"Well aside from that distraction...I believe you promised to help me?" She looked at him trying to forget the warmth of his mouth on her nipples.

"Of course my dear. I always honor every business transaction that comes through these halls. I'll present these to the Viscount since we are to go over the monthly revenues in Kirkwall."

"At least he'll see them and decide to give my children what they should have been given." She watched him pick up the petition setting it atop the other papers that were headed to the meeting.

"Well fear not Lady Amell, any child would be grateful to have such a devoted mother such as yourself."

Walking up to her, Bran gave a respectful kiss on the knuckles before leading her out of his office and down the stairs before heading off to throne room. Feeling a bit flustered at what just happened, Leandra walked down the stairs feeling a bit ashamed for what she had to do. Yet those thoughts were slowly pushed aside as she noticed her oldest chatting, more so, flirting terribly, with the nice elf named Fenris. Bethany walked behind with Isabela making kissy faces, walking towards her general direction.

Seeing them made her smile remembering this was all for the best interests of her children and their growing family. Fixing her dress and hair to look presentable, she walked down the stairs, smiling warmly at how Garrett was blushing at Fenris.

Yes, this was worth it to make them happy.

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**A/N:Welp. Please don't stone me, but there isnt enough Leandra love out there.**


	2. Chapter 2: Chantry nights

**A/N: Figured I try this again since I am alone in loving me some Milf pwp….with my new favorite ship for her. Warning for some OoC since this isn't canon. Please don't kill me, Bioware but you own something I like to reinvent. As usual the lovely Arista whipped this as my lovely beta.  
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The smell of incense wafted in the air, easing the sisters in their prayer. Elthina had given another sermon for the day, leaving many of the devout at ease and truly blessed. Some left, going about their day to finish business deals or make supper while others stayed behind to pray. There were others waiting in line to speak with the maker since it was considered healthy for the soul. One particular person, however, sat in a pew staring at Andraste's face, praying fervently.

She knelt at her pew, going over hymns that matched her swirling mood. She contemplated her thoughts, going through years'-worth of memories throughout her life. Pain and love painted into a portrait to shape her into the woman she currently is and possible will be; she began wishing for some light to shine on her head, giving her an epiphany that answered why all of _those_ things happened. A sign from the Maker and his bride, letting her know she was not alone in her plight and that there will always be a reason for her thoughts.

However, Leandra knew better; there were no such things as miracles. Moving herself out of the stance, bones and muscle creaking from the position, she stood up, bowing her head to Andraste before turning around. It seemed as though another day spent praying for short-lived relief was over, only for her to repeat it tomorrow.

Leandra figured a bit of depression was leaking its way back into her routine since it was getting dangerously close to another birthday. Mourning instead of celebrating the life that was snuffed out and taken away from her…she knew it was best not to dwell on such thoughts but was unable to stop herself. Maybe it would become too much for her in the end. How long until she finally cracked, heaping the blame on her daughter's shoulders? How long until she slowly counts away the slow crawl of seeing her daughter, only a boat ride away, without the steel giants watching their every move? Leandra felt true bitterness sweep in for a second, wondering if the Maker was there just to make her suffer because she dared to bear the offspring of an apostate…

"Excuse me, Lady Amell. I take it you are leaving services today?"

Leandra snapped out of her reverie, hearing the gentle brogue aimed towards her. Looking off to her side, one of her childrens' associates who helped fund the Deep Roads expedition stood before her.

"It's nice to see you, your grace." Leandra bowed, as is custom to royalty, however he shakes his head clasping her hands.

"Please ma'am, Sebastian is fine. I am still a lay brother of the chantry." Fingers rub against the palm making her feel at ease from their warmth. "I noticed you were praying with some difficulty earlier. May it be rude of me to ask what bothers you?"

A mere shake of her head leaves hair fluttering, back and forth, along with a tired smile. "It's nothing. Just the usual lamb lost from the herd ordeal. I'll just have to pray harder next time and learn to deal with it."

"That is sheer nonsense, Lady Amell. You know the Chantry is always willing to lend an ear for those in need of sharing their problems. It would be shameful of me to not help you in your hour of need." He gently took her arm in his, ushering off towards a quiet section of the vespers.

Leandra followed the former Prince with some reluctance knowing this confession, of sorts, would only add more to her worries then help her. Her last chat with her oldest brought up some sad memories after learning about Malcolm in the Vinmark mountains. The rustle of leather breaches against the wooden pew filled in the silence as Sebastian tried to make himself comfortable.

"In this house of the Maker your sins and confession will be told to him through me. No one shall judge you, save for the Maker himself, after letting out your sins. Tell me, good woman, when was the last time you confessed?"

A vision of a giant fire pit, unique in magical flames, was burning a corpse with tears refusing to surface on her oldest. Bethany was holding on to her as if she was going to float away. "It's been an awful while since my last confession. I'm afraid I might tell you years of frustration."

"That's alright. As long as you are willing to talk today, I'm sure the Maker will forgive your lack of trying." Sebastian gently rubs her hand with his, easing her slight tremble. "What lays on your conscience?"

Leandra smiled at his gesture, knowing it was out of respect and concern, before inhaling a deep breather. "What bears on my guilt is something I haven't thought to let others know since…I had a discussion with my Eldest yesterday, which led to a heated argument."

"Hawke took his anger out on you?"

"No," She shook her head. "He was merely replying angrily at how callous I was to replace him." This earned a look of confusion on Sebastian as Leandra sat up straight. "I talked to him about the idea of me pursuing a suitor since it's been some years since I've shared a bed with someone."

"Well, I can understand Hawke being upset, since in some way, you are replacing his father with another man." Leandra almost giggled at this, making Sebastian grin.

"I take it you don't find that sort of childish thought endearing?"

"Much so, but I am not replacing his father. No, I loved his father and no man could ever replace or take his place. He is just a little perturbed at the thought of his mother seeking a sexual partner. Humph, the double standards of that boy sometimes make me wonder."

"You mean, Hawke is upset that you would," Sebastian shifted in his seat rather slowly leaning closely. "Take a partner for the use of sex?"

"It's not like I'm asking for a one night stand. No, I am seeking more of a lover who does not feel the need to rush into matrimony. Sometimes I would like to wake up to someone in the morning after a good thorough fucking."

Sebastian felt his eyebrows rise to the top of his scalp as his collar felt a little warm. An errant image of Leandra flushed cheeks and satisfied dissolved just as quickly as it appeared. "Well, I never thought I would be surprised to hear a woman of your standing saying such a thing. Then again, from what I remembered in my youth…"

"Oh, Sebastian, Garret did tell me about how you were such a rake in your younger years. Still, just because I was married to a wonderful man doesn't mean we didn't like to be adventurous."

"'Adventurous' how, may I ask?" Sebastian scooted himself closer as sign they could talk in whispers. Leandra noted this, scooting closer herself, not noticing how close his arms brushed against hers.

"Well, I can say our love life was very pleasant on the surface to the children, letting them know we loved each other very much. However, Malcolm had an incredible appetite and he would take me where ever and whenever he got the chance. I think my knee formed up calluses from all the times I've sucked that man's prick."

Sebastian coughed rather loudly to hide the blush that formed an image of Leandra taking the late Malcolm Hawke in mouth. Lips and tongue working in unison to please, bringing a man to his knees.

Leandra noticed out the corner of her eyes, smiling at the memory from his outburst. "Yes, he was a rather big man and I could rarely, on some days, take him all without focusing on suckling his tip. Of course Malcolm always did love to pet my hair encouraging me on before he picked me up and took me standing up."

"Against a wall, while the children were in the other room?" He should have stopped himself from asking, but he reminded himself this was for her confession and not the voice in his head begging to hear more.

"Sometimes, but usually he held me up, by the strength of his arms, and thrust like a man who just escaped the Circle for the first time. He was rather strong for an Apostate…strong and gifted."

Leandra shifted her legs together as Sebastian secretly shifted his legs open. Looking around the area, he scooted closer to her, in hopes for a more private confession.

"Tell me, was that all you missed of him? The Maker will not judge if you want to enjoy the pleasures of another to keep you warm and happy." His brogue was breaking out, his tone slightly husky. Leandra smiled, looking Sebastian squarely in the eyes.

"I used to love the way he suckled at my breasts. The man was clearly infatuated with them and it might have something to do with his upbringing in the Circle. However, it also made Malcolm hard whenever I wore the traditional Fereldan dresses. Especially, after I had Garret, since it was easy to slip a breast for feeding time."

Sebastian felt a strain pushing Andraste skywards, as his mind envisioned Leandra, filled to burst with milk, and no one to suckle them dry as he eyed the low cut of her dress.

Clearing his throat, he edged his hand closer to Leandra's, stroking her palm. "So I can gather you and your husband were rather amorous."

"We were lucky to stop, after Bethany and Carver, or else the Templars would follow the trail of children to us. However, I will not say I didn't also treasure the time I spent with him. It is just now I miss curling up to a man using my breasts as pillows, while he rubs my back and sleep claims us. Since I'm not getting any grandchildren out of Garret anytime soon, I might as well tend to my needs."

Sebastian's' hand moves from his spot as the strain of reason, and arousal, merged with his duties as a lay brother of the chantry. Thankfully, no one would come to this secluded corner as Sebastian laid his head on her chest. Leandra sat still as a statue from his actions, thinking he had collapsed from all her wanton chatter.

However, his nuzzling told her something completely different. Not believing what happened next, she patted Sebastian on the head with her left hand.

"You missed this maternal feeling of a babe lying on your chest. I fear it might be guilt of not gaining more children to remember more of your husband. You also miss the warmth of another that keeps you safe and loved through the night." His fingers lightly grasp the lining of her shirt, slipping out a breast from her bodice, as his nose encircles an erect nipple. "With only a daughter in the Circle and a son adventuring to earn his keep, no wonder you feel lonely. The Maker understands and wants you to know he absolves any guilt you have."

Leandra holds in a gasp as his mouth covers over the nipple, suckling it like a hungry baby. Her hand shoves him harder down, rejoicing in the feeling of his tongue sliding over her flesh, as her other hand edges closer to a restrained member. Leandra rubs at his pent up desire, helping him vent as she lightly grips it while rubbing. Sebastian thrusts his hips into her fingers, to cause greater friction, as he unlatches from her breast. His hands reach down to the front of her dress, pressing both clothes and underclothes against the center that was burning. Leandra stifled the first moan out of her mouth, hoping the echo did not reach the lower levels.

"Don't worry on anyone finding us," Sebastian nuzzles the valley of breasts. "Evening chant has ended, giving us enough time to finish before Sister Petrice starts her rounds."

"Pray tell Sebastian, how you are so sure of this?" She sounds jovial in her question feeling like a teenager hiding from her parents. Her hand grips the warm hidden bulge moving slowly.

"Hush now, we're focusing on you right now." Teeth grip onto the same nipple earning a gasp of pleasure as rough fingertips, from years of pulling back bows and notching arrows, rub into the bundle of nerves making Leandra squirm, tears forming in her eyes.

"Oh yes, suckle just a little bit harder. Ohh, I fear I have another confession Sebastian." Her voice was low and heavy with want earning another thrust into her hands.

"Do please continue and don't hold back." Sebastian growls.

Before Leandra can speak another word of desire laced into her words, a thrill voice pierced their small haven belonging to a similar voice.

"I assure you, your Grace. If you do not give mind to heathens at the dock, why not break bread with the maleficars whom shout on about oppression in the Gallows?"

"Petrice, you're over stating yourself again over such a trivial matter. If they are receiving converts that are seeking them, maybe we should think twice about seeing to our own and making them happy with the Maker's chant."

Sebastian never thought for grand jokes played on his person, but he felt mortified in knowing that the Grand Cleric herself would find him in a most ungallant position. He could envision the shame on her face knowing he gave in to his old ways. Thankfully, Leandra was two steps ahead of him in making them both presentable, as she stood up wiping tears from her eyes.

"I don't see how...Oh, Lady Amell."

"Good day to you Mother Petrice, Your Holiness."

"Leandra, I take it you have some terrible news to present us?" Her holiness moved closer placing a hand on trembling shoulders as Sebastian fixed himself.

"No, I was just making a confession with Sebastian. The anniversary of my Husband's passing came and we never really had time for a proper burial since we were moving." A handkerchief appeared from Petrice, who was showing some form of human emotion and wiping away Leandra's tears as she went to console the woman.

This gave Sebastian the proper excuse needed to take his leave, as the women bonded over the subject. He felt the need to pray very hard for such a promiscuous act in the house of the Maker. This was best left to Hawke's and Isabela's antics, even though he didn't feel any guilt for said actions. He stopped in front of Andraste, kneeling in pray as he went over what exactly happened.

It was not until later that Leandra stood next to him in silence. She watched with a calm expression, looking over Sebastian's kneeling form with curious longing.

A gentle cough gained his attention as Leandra smiled. "I take it our confession is done for the day?"

"Yes, indeed. I am afraid to say Her Holiness and Mother Petrice supersede my position to hear the suffering of others."

"That is a pity since you were doing so well with easing my suffering." Leandra folds her arms over her breasts, encircling a nipple, to push her point.

Sebastian inhaled deeply as his eyes looked on with hunger at the display. "Perhaps if we were to continue at a later date, I'm sure we could talk about any other subjects that can't be told in a normal confession."

"Perhaps we could set a schedule to discuss scripts of the chant to further my knowledge of the Maker?"

"One can never spend enough time talking scriptures." He displayed his usual smile, full of grace and piety, to hide the wolf's smile as he walked Leandra to the entrance.

"Perhaps we can start tonight over dinner? It seems Garret won't be back tonight and plans to spend the night at the Hanged Man again." Leandra smiled rubbing his arm.

Sebastian couldn't help kissing her hand. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

The golden hours of dawn give way as night begins to fall back to let the moon rest. No one is out at this time except those waking early to set up their wares and coming back from drunken stupors. Said drunkard was Hawke, trying with his best rogue abilities, to sneak into his manor. It was not like the man to act like a teenager, coming into the house after curfew, but it was mostly due to avoiding his mother that was the cause.

The last thing he needed was to be reminded how much of an angry ass he had treated her.

Feeling his hangover mix with guilt was not a remedy to the start of his day. He gently locked the door behind him.

"Good Morning, Master Hawke. I didn't hear you entering." Bodahn did not usually act perturbed over such things, but it was rare to see him up this early making Hawke breakfast.

More like Hawke and his mother, going by the amount of food on the tray.

"Sorry about that. I had a rough night with Bella ordering rum like it was out of style, starting a bar fight 'cause that drunken ex-king thought Fenris was a talking Llama, and the usual ending with Varric gathering a crowd for tomorrow to hear the exploits." Hawke grabbed a piece of bacon, munching on it rather loudly. "Funny, mother never did like her bacon crispy."

"That's because Lady Leandra is staying in for the day and wants to lounge in peace."

"Oh, Mother is having a lazy Sunday, eh? I don't remember the last time she did something like that." He sipped the extra cup of coffee noting the strange taste of cinnamon. "How about I take this up to her while you and Sandal take the morning off, eh?"

"No, no Messere! It's quite alright. You go in the study to relax, since you just came back from a rather exhilarating night, and I'll go serve,"

"Oh phish posh man, learn to take a vacation." Hawke grabbed the tray from Bodahn, walking up the stairs, two steps at a time.

He made it up to his mother's room, with Bodahn still trailing behind him muttering about modesty and private space, until he knocked on the door.

"Mother, I have room service for a rather sleepy woman. Particularly your bacon woman, which I might eat if you don't come out."

"Please be quiet, someone is still sleeping off last night." A muffled voice says through the door.

"Well, I was going to this morning, but seeing the breakfast made me," Before he can finish the next words Sebastian opens the door, dressed in nothing that the Maker gave him and thankfully obscured by the tray. "Lose my appetite."

Sebastian gently took the tray from him, as five shades of confusion and shock etched across his face. Putting a finger up to his lips, the archer had a devilish smile. "Please do keep your voice down; I planned to surprise Leandra with this after last night. She does need her beauty sleep."

Slipping behind the door, tray in hand Sebastian closes the door on Hawke, who was still in some form of PSTD. He could not quite fathom what just happened, but his brain refused to acknowledge what transpired between his mother and…Hawke suddenly felt like curling up into a ball. Thankfully, Bodahn patted him on the arm directing him down the stairs.

"Perhaps Messer would like some pancakes to make himself feel better?"

Hawke nods his head.

"Would Messer also like some hot cocoa to go along with that?"

"Only if you make those apple bunny ears on my pancakes." Hawke whimpers, letting the shock wear off.

"Of course, messere." Bohdan began to steer a sad Hawke into the kitchen.

Thankfully, just in time before the first moans erupted from Leandra's room.

**A/N: If you want some descriptive smexy Milf with choir boy, ya'll should write your own. ****Hehehehehhee, aint I a stinker?**  



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